This is me + my bear. My bear is 30. I’m 32. We’ve been friends for a long time. When I left the USSR for Vancouver, Canada I was 2. I had another stuffed animal. But he got lost on the way over. I was devastated. A new country. A new home. A long flight. Saying goodbye to family. Leaving scratchy imprints on my developing brain. Things change. More times than not, you’re going to go away. + when you return? People will get older. Some you won’t see again. Life isn’t permanent.
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Meenya. This guy. Became my comfort. He used to have hair on his nose. His right paw used to have a brown patch of leather with his name stitched in letters: ZEDDY. Zeddy the Teddy. But he was Meenya; teddy bear in Russian. I chewed off his leather. Sucked on his nose like a comforting pacifier until he lost all of his hair. I’d put on different sweaters on him. There you are, Meenya, I’d say. He made everything better. He made everything whole again. Okay. He was. He is. My constant. My comfort. My friend.
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Last weekend I lost a dear friend. He went, as the good ones do, too soon. I found out while laying in the dark in my bed. My lip quivered. My eyes flooded with tears. Not again. Why. Why all the good ones. Why all the ones who get me + I get them. I didn’t know where to turn. Who’d understand? So I turned to Meenya. I hugged him. His fur soaking up my tears as I sobbed for my dear friend. If only he had a Meenya. If only he had a friend. A constant companion to hold his hand as life throws it’s inevitable curveballs. Bc life gets tough. Life gets hard. Life isn’t permanent.
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Sometimes, all we need is a friend. To ask: how are you doing? Really. To listen: period. To hug: so that they know that they’re not invisible. To share: sometimes the loneliness is unbearable but together it doesn’t seem as scary. To say: asking for help is strength not weakness. To reassure: you’re, no, we’re going to be okay.
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Yeah. Being human is hard alright. Don’t forget to look past the smiles, the laughs, the social media stories. Go deeper. You never know how much the person next to you needs a Meenya. A hug. A friend. Or, just a somebody to listen. To say, hey, you + me? We’re going to be okay.